The Boy Is Trouble
by everything-is-eninalus
Summary: ONESHOT. Derek decides to have a little risky fun with Spencer.


**Gah! Sorry for the long break in between stories! I was wrapped up in a few things and juts didn't have a lot of time!**

**Anyway, here's my first oneshot (Yay for first times!) and so I hope you guys like it!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own these guys, they belong to CBS**

**Warning: This fic is rated M for some mature content.**

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><p>Spencer found himself repeating the same word over and over in his head, trying to keep focused.<p>

_Opposite, opposite, opposite._

It took the genius' incoherent brain around ten seconds to determine exactly _what_ was opposite.

The temperatures.

Against the length of his back was the freezing cold hood of the car, his shirt open and pushed up under his shoulder blades. Spencer really didn't have any fat on him, so the naked skin-to-metal was almost painful.

The heat of Derek's roaming hands and mouth, however, was delicious.

"Derreeekk," He whined as the older man took his nipple in his mouth. "We're gonna get caught."

"Mmm," Was Derek's reply.

"We really shouldn't be doing this here…"

Derek lifted his head. "Baby, it's an empty parking lot for a rundown park. No one comes out here."

"Y-you did." Spencer tried reasoning as Derek's hot mouth found his chest again.

Spencer felt the large hands wind down his sides to his pant line, teasing at the belt.

"Pretty boy, I have to have you."

Spencer tried to be strong, he really did, but the rational part of his brain was diminishing quickly.

"This is illegal." He said weakly. "If we get caught-"

"We're not going to get caught."

Spencer whined as Derek pulled his pants down slowly, lightly brushing the bulge in Spencer's boxers with his lips.

"We c-could at least do this _in_ the car." Spencer tried reasoning again.

"Where's the fun in that? Where's the danger?"

"It's still technically sex, and it's still illegal." Spencer breathed as Derek began pulling his boxers down too.

The older man pretended he didn't hear him and licked a stripe up the underside of Spencer's erection.

"Oh god." The slighter man breathed. "What are you doing to me, Derek?"

"Hopefully, corrupting you, baby boy."

Spencer nodded. "I think it's working." He gulped.

"Good, maybe I'll get what I want then." Derek swallowed the whole of Spencer's cock and the younger man gasped.

"Nnngghh, Derek!"

"Yes?" Derek teased.

"I-i-in m-me." Spencer shivered. "N-now please."

"Are you sure?" Derek asked, swirling his tongue around the tip.

Spencer whimpered. "Y-yeah."

Derek lifted his head and smiled. "I aim to please."

"Lube's in the g-glove compartment."

The older man quirked an eyebrow. "You keep lube in the glove compartment of your car?"

Spencer shrugged. "You're thrill seeking and irresistible. I-I want to keep you happy."

Derek smiled and kissed him hard on the mouth. "I love you."

"I love you, too. Now, go get the lube before I freeze to death."

Derek ducked into the car quickly before returning, lube in hand. "I'll have you warmed up in a moment, baby."

Spencer nodded while Derek coated his fingers. He leaned over and found Spencer's entrance in a matter of seconds. The younger man gasped at the chill of it, but Derek's finger slipped in without much resistance. He took the second finger slower since Spencer shifted a bit, but he didn't make a noise until the third finger started to stretch the muscle.

Spencer gripped Derek's arm and hissed.

"I got you, baby. I'm going slow." Derek reassured and Spencer nodded, attempting to relax further. The slighter man's eyes closed and Derek smiled wickedly before twisting his fingers.

"Gah!" Spencer's eyes flew open and he started squirming while Derek continued to work his sweet spot. "C-come on, Derek!" Spencer moaned. "I'm cold and horny. Get in!"

Derek chuckled but wasted no time unbuckling his belt and pulling off his own pants and boxers. He only pulled them to his knees before slicking up. Moments later he was pushing into his lover.

"Ooohh!" Spencer moaned and Derek clapped a hand over his mouth.

"Not too loud, baby boy." He whispered and Spencer nodded.

"Sorry, you're just so biiggg!" He groaned.

Derek reached up and grabbed onto the rim below the windshield for leverage. He began working in and out of Spencer's tight heat, grunting at the amazing friction.

"So good, baby." He panted, kissing Spencer's neck.

"Yeah?" Spencer breathed.

"The best." Derek moaned, keeping a steady pace, pivoting into Spencer.

Spencer whimpered wantonly and the noise made Derek pump faster, latching his mouth to the underside of Spencer's jaw.

"Okay guys. Up off the car."

The voice came from behind them and Derek immediately stopped all motions.

Spencer gasped.

"Come on, guys. Let's go."

"Oh god." Spencer breathed. "Ohgodohgodohgod." He squeezed his eyes shut. "Derek?" He squeaked quietly.

Derek slowly pulled out of Spencer, completely aware of his exposed ass. He hiked up his pants and did them up before offering Spencer a hand.

Spencer stood and pulled up his own pants, Derek standing in front of him so whomever the voice belonged to wouldn't see anything. Finally, he glanced over Derek's shoulder.

A young female police officer stood there, one hand on a holstered gun.

"Do you have any weapons on you?"

Spencer shook his head and began doing up his shirt as Derek turned.

"So sorry, officer. The place was deserted."

She gave a sad smile. "I'm sorry, too. I've got to take you to the station."

"Aw, please?" Derek tried reasoning.

"I'm really sorry, I know this place is empty but I don't have a choice."

Derek heard Spencer groan quietly behind him.

The woman was kind, putting the cuffs on them loosely and giving a sad smile.

"You guys will be the third this week. This is the prime place for public fornication, apparently. I have to say, though, you will be the first same-gender couple."

"Sorry about that." Derek murmured.

"Are you apologizing for being gay? No need. I'm not the judging type." She said as she seated them in the car.

"I hate you." Spencer muttered as the officer closed their door and walked around the front of the car.

"I'm sorry, babe-"

"Don't 'babe' me right now, Derek. I told you thins would happen."

"I know but-"

Just then the officer got in and Derek knew he would be in more trouble if he tried to talk to Spencer about it in front of her.

The rest of the car ride was relatively quiet. Derek tried apologizing twice more, but Spencer just ignored him completely.

"Here we are boys." The woman said as she pulled into the station. She guided them out of the car and into a holding cell at the back with a few other men in it. "Be right back," She said before walking down the hall.

"Spence, please don't be mad." Derek begged quietly so the other strangers couldn't hear them.

"I have _never_ been to jail, Derek. I can't believe this."

"I know, I know. I so sorry."

"I don't want an apology. I want to get out of here." Spencer sat on one of the benches and put his head in his hands. "I can't believe I gave in to you."

"What're you two in for?" A sleazy drugged up guy with long dark hair and an unshaven face dressed in hippy clothes leaned towards Spencer.

"Public indecency." Spencer scoffed.

"So you like, what? Streaked? Or like, peed on something?"

"Sure, something like that." Spencer said, looking pointedly at Derek.

"That sucks, dude. I was in for that once. Not the worst of things."

Spencer shook his head. "It is for _me."_ He said with another glare at Derek, who just stood in the corner looking sheepish.

The man didn't pick up on the insinuation and nodded. "Yeah, you don't look like the jail type."

"I'm not."

The young officer came back a moment later and looked at Derek.

"Want a phone call?" She asked.

"Pardon?"

"A phone call. I reported it as a lesser incident than it was. You can get out on bail and this will all go away." She leaned in. "I won't even take your information, so there wont be a dint on your record."

"Wow, thank you so much!" He looked back at Spencer, who was still looking grim. "A phone call would be awesome."

"Who in the world is going to bail us out at one in the morning, Derek?"

"A certain blonde-haired honey who's got the hots for us."

"Oh god," Spencer dropped his head. "We're never going to hear the end of it."

Derek shrugged and the woman gave him a quarter for the small pay phone. He took it graciously and dialed in the number.

The phone rang three times before a voice connected.

"Who _is_ this?"

"Penelope, baby." Derek put on his most charming tone.

"Derek, something either horrifically awful or deliciously excellent had better be going on or I will strangle you. Have you _any_ idea what time it is?"

"Yeah, baby, I know. Look, me and Spencer were, uh… caught being… well, indecent in public, and uh-"

"What? Were you two being nasty in a car or something?"

"More like… _on_ a car."

"Serious? Oh god. Why are you two so yummy? And how come I didn't get called out?"

"Look, Pen, we're in jail now."

"Ooh, kinky."

"We need someone to bail us out."

"Really?" There was a pause. "What's in it for me?"

Derek sighed. Typical Penelope.

"What do you want?"

"Well, what I really want would definitely freak your little genius out, so… I'll make a compromise."

"And what's that?"

"Details."

"What?"

"I want every little dirty detail of at least five of your kinkiest exploits together."

"What? Pen-"

"My mind is made up. Your baby boy can be there or not but I am _seriously_ in the mood for some hot male sex and well, you two are both smoking. Together? Doing the nasty? That's just too impossible to resist."

"But baby girl-"

"No, no, no. No 'buts'. It's 'yes' or 'no'"

Derek sighed. He and Spencer had done some _pretty_ kinky stuff through the course of their relationship and he wasn't sure if he really wanted to go over them with Penny. But, it was either that or have Spencer be pissed at him.

"Okay then."

"Great! I'll be there soon."

"Thanks, doll."

"Oh, no, my chocolate god. Thank _you."_

He hung up and gave Spencer an uneasy smile.

"She'll be here soon."

Spencer studied him before his face went dark. "It's for a price isn't it?"

"Well, it _is_ Penelope."

"Do I have to be there?"

"Not necessarily-"

"Then whatever it is, I'm fine with it. Just so long as I get out of this hell hole."

"It's just a holding cell."

"I don't care."

It was about twenty more minutes before the officer came back. She opened the door and undid both of their handcuffs before escorting them into the main room where Penelope was sitting.

"Thanks, baby girl."

"No problem, love bug." She said standing and hugging them.

"Yeah, thanks, Garcia."

"You're welcome. Now, Spencey, stop being mad at Derek. He's irresistible at the best of times."

"Yeah, and he _uses_ it." Spencer muttered.

"This way."

Both men followed the bubbly girl to her car and got in. Once they were situated, Derek turned back to Spencer.

"I'm really, really, really, _really_ sorry, baby."

"I know." Spencer sighed. "You're forgiven."

"Great!" Penelope said happily. "Now, Derek, I want you to come over now."

"Now? It's one thirty!"

"So?"

"I should get Spencer back to the apartment."

"Oh, no. Garcia, you can drop me off at the park and I'll drive home. I don't know what Derek's doing for you but I think he deserves his punishment now."

"Yay!" Penelope cried.

They drove to the deserted park and they watched Spencer walk around the car and then bend to pick something up before getting in.

"What was on the ground there, Der?"

"The lube Spence keeps in the glove compartment."

"Oh," Penny smiled. "This is gonna be good."

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><p><strong>Hope you guys liked it! I have a great story percolating that I'm really excited to start so check back for that!<strong>

**Let me know what you guys thought!**

**Love always! Xoxoxo**


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